18 weeks

friday we hit the 18 week mark.  Sometimes its still hard to believe because I dont always "feel" pregnant yet. I mean yes.. my clothes dont fit, i probably out eat riley now and i certainly have surpassed the amount of times he wakes up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom.. but the little bump is still pretty tiny.. seems extra tiny considering ive already gained 16 pounds!

The suspense is killing me waiting to find out the sex. I had another dream that we somehow found out a week before my appt it was a girl and the shopping sprees commenced.  Riley had a dream it was a boy, but still refers to the baby as Emma. Clearly he knows ;) 11 more days. February 1, please get here now.. not to mention that will be another month of deployment complete.

This weekend I've been filled with alot of anxiety. I stupidly read the chapter in the baby book of everything that can go wrong so of course i started worrying about every little thing. I worry about being to small for the baby to grow, the baby not growing at the right rate. I worry about trying to do so much since I have no one else here.

I also started thinking alot about how hard it is going to be doing all this with out him. It freaks me out he may not be in the hospital with me. It freaks me out not knowing alot of things. Im a planner.. which does not co-inside well with military life. Today as I went grocery shopping all I could think is how much harder it will be 6 months from now. Since i cant just send Riley or leave the baby with him. The easiest things will be so much harder. and the pregnancy dreams.. yikes. Ive had a honey badger bite my thumb off, Ive gone to jail, ive been shot in the head and ive lost riley. ive also had dreams the baby was born the size of my hand and that we had the smartest baby ever that started talking at 6 months.

I think deployment in general is starting to wear on me. Ive done my best to be as positive as possible but Im just over waking up alone every day, doing everything by myself. Not having my other half around even just to have a conversation with. I know I have alot more time to go and I know in the end it will be ok but its just one of those days. 2 months down.. too many more to go. 

ok i think im done with venting for now. Next update we should finally know for real!

Second Trimester!

Well I thought blogging about baby wold force me to update more but who would ever thought I would be so  BUSY over a deployment Yet here I am at the 16 week (basically 4 moth mark!) and only my second post. I guess working full time, owning a home, having 3 furbabies and the holidays will do that to you!

For starters, I miss Riley like crazy! I cant believe how never ending this deployment will be but im doing my best to stay positive. Thank god for skype and free texting aps!

Anways parents were down here fo pre-holiday festivities. It was great having them and I got the guest room put together just in time! While i was hard at work at work they were hard at working picking out and hanging up curtains and putting together the new entertainment center they got us. (yes i realized we have no pictures of the new house as people continuously asked me over the holiday season so once my cleaning is done ill take some and post them on fb) Everything looks great. Saturday we went to the nex anf Baby M now has furniture! Well.. most of it! Next on my list are the mattress and a rocker.. maybe a small bookself if we have room. Its not put together yet but heres what it will look like:

The nursary its self still needs tons of work. Starting with a paint color. None the less super excited. We also got the baby a blue camo onsie to match daddy. no pictures yet!

Needless to say Baby also made out great over the holidays. Babys first gift came from Heather then was continuously spoiled right through the holidays. Heres a small sample. I hate that it looks "boyish" but really everything can be gender nuetral and dressed up with cute bows!

So far Ive alreayd gained 15 pounds from Baby M (yikes!) but was told today I "wear it well" All of the girls at work noticed however that I seemed to have "popped" while i was gone. Hard for me to tell but here is some pictures of the weeks so far

12 weeks:

14 weeks:

Babys first X-mas shot:

15 weeks:

Official 16 week one will have to follow after tomorrow! My next doctors appointment is Monday and maybe just maybe if Baby cooperates we will know the gender! Will it be Emma or Carter?!

Now there seems to be endless amounts of things to do to keep me busy. Also I got to see Amanda and the other golden girls while at home and saw Baby B's nursary! So pretty! I cant wait to meet her :) Howver it did make me realize just how much still needs to be done so please show yourself on Monday baby so we cant get started!